goldenheartedrose:
gabbysilang:
This is better than every single found footage film I have ever seen.
I have no idea what he’s saying but I’m laughing anyways because he’s so damn passionate about it. Also the craptions are awful. More awful than usual.
[A photo of a man in a coat posed in front of a waterfall. Text above reads, “This is my cousin Oskaar”. Text below reads, “I told him WA is about to vote on daylight savings.”]
[Another photo of Oskaar holding a wine bottle in one hand. Text below reads, “And that most people would vote against it.”]
[Text onscreen reads, “About a week later Oskaar sent me this”.]
[Oskaar walks onscreen, turns, waves at the camera. It’s dark; he’s the only thing visible. He’s wearing a heavy coat, a scarf, and mittens.]
Hi Dave! Hi! In Australia! It’s Oskaar here! In Iceland! I got your email the other day! IT MADE ME REALLY FUCKING ANGRY! You know I get three hours of sunlight per day! Every day, three hours! And you, are arguing about one hour!
Guess what time it is! Look around! It’s a beautiful day! In sunny Reykjavik! [Oskaar pulls up his sleeve to show the camera his watch] At—twenty minutes past three o’clock!
[Jump-cut; Oskaar is standing again at a distance from the camera] Now—I have— [Camera pans suddenly up to look at the black sky]
[Jump cut; Oskaar’s face is close to the camera now, he’s adjusting it on its tripod] [Oskaar mutters, possibly in Icelandic, or possibly the captioner just can’t understand what he’s saying] Sorry Dave! My—my—my camera is broken!
[Jump-cut; Oskaar is standing again at a distance from the camera] I have to sit! for two hours! in front of ultra-violet light! That’s so, to help my mind and my skins, from being healthy! I drink this, lýsi, do you know what lýsi is? Lýsi is oil from fish, I drink fish shits two times per day! This stops me from being funny in the head! It’s called, it’s called… sk— [Oskaar looks to the left, like something’s distracted him offscreen?]
[Jump-cut; Oskaar is in the same position as in the last shot, looking back at the camera] Hey there, Dave, I want you to do this for me. I want you to show everybody in your silly city some things that I do in my life. I’ll take you for a journey, come with me.
[Jump-cut. Oskaar is not in-frame; the camera is being carried. Are we looking at the ground, seeing the sidewalk pass by as Oskaar walks? Or are we looking straight ahead? It’s too dark to tell.] Uh, this is what I do every day after I… come home from work, I take my dog for a walk in this beautiful park here, can you see? No, you can’t see, cos it’s fucking too dark. [You can hear the dog breathing in the background] Hey, you haven’t seen my dog, have you? Stalone, you know, Stalone, like the Cliffhanger movies. Stalone! Hang on. Stalone! Stalone!
[Jump-cut; the camera is back on its tripod. Oskaar is sitting on a bench, with a tree just visible in the background, hardly more than a shadow. The camera starts panning back to aim at the sky again. Oskaar gets up to catch it.] Oh shit—
[A brief shot of the empty bench, and then a close-up of Oskaar’s face as he films himself while walking.] Eh, hey. Now I’m going on a journey to one of our famous beaches here in Iceland. [Oskaar looks at his feet] Auuugh! Fucking dog shi—
[Jump-cut; Oskaar is standing in front of the ocean] I’m in my Icelandic beach! Hey Dave! [Hops on one foot while trying to remove his shoe] Let’s go and have a swim with me!
[Oskaar dips a toe in the water] Ah-ha-ha-haaaa! [Oskaar hops back toward the camera] I wouldn’t swim in that if you fucking paid me million dollars!
If I could have your hour I would rip it from your, your hands, before you! Be heroes! You are be heroes! Save, save your daylight! Save it! Don’t let it run away in front of your face!
[Jump-cut; Oskaar’s face is close to the camera.] Think about me, Dave. Tell your friends. Hey—Fucking battery!
[Image flickers out. Text is displayed: "And I never did see Stalone.“ Audio-only, a dog is yipping under Oskaar’s voice:] Stalone! Come here now, you stupid dog!