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08 Fri Jul 2016
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04 Mon Jul 2016
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Imagine if Dudley did have a magical child though.
He and Harry haven’t spoken since ‘I don’t think you’re a waste of space’ and he’s matured enough to realise his parents were not good to Harry, especially since the birth of his own little girls because God forbid anything happened to him and they were treated like Harry was.
On Daisy Dursley’s eleventh birthday theres a knock on the door and his wife, Anita, just stares and he feels his stomach drop because the stern lady on the doorstep is wearing a cloak and pointed hat.
They listen to the woman – Professor McGonagall – explain and Anita is surprised but receptive, Daisy is excited and Dudley is terrified of what this means.
It’s a surprise to his wife and little girl when at the end of her explanation, while Daisy’s flicking through a book with moving pictures and Anita peers over her shoulder, Dudley blurts out ‘it’s safe now then? Your world?’
Professor Mcgonagall gives a wry smile and assures him that the magical world is indeed safe. It dawns on him that she was expecting this, that she’d perhaps researched him and was aware of his relation to Harry.
He then admits to Anita and Daisy that his cousin is a wizard, before turning to the Professor and asking if she by chance knows a Harry Potter. Looking amused, professor Mcgonagall acknowledges that she does.
’D’you know where he lives?’
That does surprise her a bit, and she tells him that yes, she knows and that though Daisy’s acceptance into the school has been confidential up until this point, Harry would likely not mind a visitor if he wanted a word.
Daisy begs to come along and he relents eventually, bringing Anita and their youngest, Poppy, along.
All four of them stand on the doorstep of a modest house that Dudley would call nice if there weren’t squat little creatures snickering and running around the front garden.
The door is opened by a slouching boy with turquoise hair who arches a purple eyebrow at them. He yells over his shoulder for someone named Ginny and steps back to let them in, and, when he notices Daisy staring at his hair, he smirks and a second later it’s bubblegum pink.
Daisy squeals in delight and Dudley is still trying to get his head around that when young girl and boy around Daisy’s age with bright red hair and thick brown curls respectively, hurtle down the corridor.
‘Teddy you promised you’d practice the sloth grip roll with us!’ The girl yells in an accusatory tone.
A woman with hair the same shade of flaming red as the little girl appears with what Dudley recognises as a wand in her hand as the boy with blue hair flashes a grin at them before chasing the two younger children outside to a shout of ‘No higher than the treetops Teddy!’
Harry is much like Dudley remembers him, lanky with a pointed face, straight nose and mess of untameable black hair. It’s awkward, but, apparently forewarned, Harry greets him pleasantly and introduces his wife before Ginny goes outside to reign in a gaggle of children he assumes aren’t all Harry’s.
A woman with thick, bushy hair pulled into a messy bun with a wand stuck in it smiles and makes an effort to talk to Anita. She’s not too strange, he thinks, and reassures them that her parents were just as baffled when they found out she was a witch.
‘Why don’t you take Daisy outside to see the broomsticks, Al?’ Harry suggests to Daisy’s obvious delight and Dudley swears Harry’s trying not to laugh.
By the end of the visit Dudley is more informed about the wizarding world than he ever thought he would or wanted to be. Daisy, with a bruise on her forehead and scraped knees, because despite both his and Harry’s warning she hadn’t been able to resist trying to fly, is bouncing off the walls because ‘daddy how could you not tell us?!’
They visit Harry’s a lot over summer and Daisy befriends Lily Luna Potter and Hugo Weasley. Dudley doesn’t feel up to the trip to Diagon Alley but regrets his decision to not go when Daisy comes back with two owls, ‘uncle Harry bought the second one for me! So you can write without having to wait for me to send my owl!’
Petunia Dursley faints when she finds out, and Vernon spends a good half hour cursing and brandishing things aimlessly before retreating to his shed.
Dudley being introduced to what he calls ‘all those bloody gingers’ some of whom are only just on the right side of civil to him (one cheerfully introduces himself as someone who once visited his childhood home in a flying car and asks if he’s going to need to do the same for Daisy or will she be allowed to attend without punishment).
Daisy is shocked to find out Harry’s famous, and finds out as much as she can about him during her first term, which she relays to an increasingly guilty feeling Dudley, who’s gradually coming around to the idea.
It’s not as bad as his parents made out it was. He’s learned to understand Daisy’s ramblings about her subjects and spells and is proud of her achievements at school. He’s met a handful of witches and wizards through Harry and the world that he’s always been told is terrible doesn’t seem too bad anymore, after all, how could it with his little girl in it? He is prepared come excitable little Poppy’s eleventh birthday, for her to join her sister at Hogwarts instead of standing jealously on the platform as she leaves.
Poppy Dursley never gets a letter.
I TRUSTED YOU
No, but imagine. Three generations later, this family FINALLY gets the one wizard kid/one Muggle kid thing right. Poppy is never made to feel less, even though she’s disappointed. Daisy is never made to feel like a freak. Poppy is accepted by Harry’s kids, they play with her and she doesn’t need magic to play wizard chess or toss gnomes and Teddy takes her flying sometimes (she becomes a hell of a Quidditch referee and strategist with Ginny’s help, though she never plays).
Anita and Dudley talk to Poppy about what she’d like to do for school and she goes to a prestigious Muggle school, and as it turns out she becomes really, really good at tech and coding. She takes lots of time off to visit Daisy at Hogwarts where she becomes a favorite of McGonagall (so many clever questions). Eventually she meets Luna and spends most of a summer with her, following Crumple-Horned Snorkacks with the help of some trackers Poppy built to work around magic. Everyone is terribly impressed, and although Poppy tries to be blasé about it, she’s actually really proud.
And soon enough Daisy is graduating and working at the Ministry in the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office with Arthur Weasley, who has been working on loosening some of the legislation, and when Poppy graduates she has a marvelous idea. She and Daisy open a shop in Diagon Ally for all these Muggle technologies that Poppy has fixed to work around and with magic. Dursley’s Muggle Magic, they call it.
And suddenly wizards are running around with iPhones and Kindles (Hermione made a digital copy of Hogwarts, a History RIGHT AWAY) and everyone is catching up on decades of video games and a century of movies. Scorpius Malfoy has an Apple Watch. And it’s all thanks the Poppy Dursley, the Muggle.
14 Tue Jun 2016
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FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT PERCY WEASLEY, WHO WAS THOUGHT TO BE STUFFY AND SERIOUS, WAS THE LAST PERSON WHO MADE FRED WEASLEY LAUGH.
FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT PERCY WEASLEY IS STILL A TITANIC ASSHOLE WHO DID NOT EARN REDEMPTION.
EXCUSE ME? YOU COME ONTO MY POST? MY POST ABOUT PERFECT PERCY AND YOU SAY THIS? OH NO HONEY, YOU’RE NOT GETTING OFF THAT EASY.
Percy Weasley 100% deserved his redemption and you want to know why?! Too bad, I’m going to tell you. For his whole life, Percy Weasley was made fun of, he was teased by all his siblings, constantly the butt of jokes. Whenever he was proud of his accomplishments, his family (besides his mother) shut him down. Prefect? Fred and George made fun of him for bragging, for being excited that he lived up to Bill and Charlie’s shadow. Head Boy? Fred and George teased him, stole his badge because they thought it was funny. Percy was so happy and proud of himself and his brothers tore him down. He was pushed aside for Bill or Charlie or even Ron and Ginny. Sure, his mother was proud of him, but his brothers made sure they made his life hell. When he got his job at the Ministry he was so excited. Right of school he got a job he loved, a job he was sure he was good at. He talked about it a lot but that’s what happens when you’re excited. His parents were proud, but again, his siblings made sure to tease him. When Crouch didn’t know his name, his siblings laughed, Fred and George sent him dragon dung.
Then he gets the job of Junior Assistant to the Minister. He’s proud because he’s 2 years out of school and has this prestigious position. Of course he’s going to want to share with his family. What do they do? Tell him his hard work meant nothing, that the Minister was using him (and sure, that was probably true, but Percy was so excited). He saw that he and his family shared two very different views and opinions, some words were said, and Percy left. Reminds me of another beloved character that never gets shit about leaving his family from the fandom. Any guesses who? If you said Sirius Black you are correct! Like Sirius, he left home and the family he clearly no longer saw eye to eye with. That’s not a problem. He felt as though he was in a toxic environment, and honestly he was. I do not blame him for leaving his family even if they were for the wrong reasons. (but why does Percy get shit for leaving a toxic family when Sirius doesn’t? interesting) Now we don’t know what happened when he was at the Ministry. He wrote a letter to Ron that was a bit rude, but we’re also seeing this from Harry’s limited POV. Maybe Percy regretted leaving, maybe he loved his freedom and never wanted to go home. We just don’t know. He finally does come home for Christmas in 1996 (HBP), where he openly welcomed by his mother. He was being used by Scrimgeour, but he went. While his mother was welcoming, his siblings are not. He leaves with mashed parsnips in his face. Did he want to be there? No idea, but he went. How do you think he felt leaving? Probably awful. He didn’t go to Bill and Fleur’s wedding, but it was clear from the way his family treated him the year before that even if he did go, no one wanted him there.
The Battle of Hogwarts comes and Percy comes back. Yes, comes back. He went back to the family he left, he apologized for leaving and for being ‘family disowning, ministry loving, power hungry moron’ (as Fred put it), which he takes full blame for being. What happens next? Fred welcomes him back. Then his parents. Then George. They did not need to do this, but they did because they were family and they still loved each other. Percy fights in the Battle and ends up going up against Pius. He makes the “Hello, Minister, did I mention that I’m resigning!” joke which shows that his limited view has been expanded. He finally saw what was wrong with this Ministry, with what was happening around him (though this may not all be his fault, he surrounded himself with people who also had very limited knowledge and views). When Fred is shown dead, it is Percy who is crying over his body, Percy who tries to protect his body and hide it. Wonder how guilty he felt after this happened because he made Fred laugh and then Fred dies. We don’t know what happens to Percy after this but we clearly know he has a very fierce love of his family and that he was really and truly sorry.
So TLDR; Percy loves his family and was very sorry and hurt by them. He 100% deserved his redemption even if you don’t think so. And if you don’t, don’t comment on other people’s posts about him saying rude things about Percy because you will be proven wrong. Thank you and have a good day.
Honestly, if my family shut me down for every single good thing that happened to me, that I earned, I’d leave too. Staying loyal to people who constantly ignore or make fun of your position is exhausting. I hated Percy at first too, but then I realized that if I was in his position, I wouldn’t act any different. No one needs that kind of toxicity in their life.
13 Fri May 2016
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So it’s 3AM and It’s just occurred to me that the most telling scene in the entire Harry Potter franchise is the scene following the announcement of the participants of the Triwizard tournament.
When Harry’s name is pulled out of the cup, literally one of the first things he is asked is “did you ask an older boy to put your name in the cup for you?“ or something to that effect, insinuating that, that was something nobody prepared for and that it was something that totally would have worked if anyone had been smart enough to figure it out.
However, in an earlier scene a student is turned into a hundred year old man when they try to artificially age themselves with a potion and put their name into the cup. Meaning someone trying to dangerously age themselves with potion they aren’t familiar with was something the teachers genuinely considered to be more likely than someone asking for fucking help from another student.
In other words, the wizards in Harry Potter’s world are so reliant on magic that it doesn’t occur to anyone save for people like Harry that asking for help is even an option in a given situation. This explains why wizards are so fucking ass-backwards at everything, they’re so confident that their magic is capable of doing everything for them that it has never occurred to fucking anyone that perhaps asking for help from the muggle world might be of some use.
Think about it, the wizarding world hasn’t changed in hundreds of years while in that same space of time the muggle world has figured out fucking space travel. I know it’s a cliché to say to say someone could have fucking shot Voldemort, but seriously, somebody totally fucking could have, he killed like 50 people, he was effectively a terrorist, if anyone in the wizarding world bothered to ask for help from the muggles instead of just telling them there was an invisible asshole flying around shooting death curses at everyone, they may have been able to help.
Pretty much the only reason Voldermort thinks he’s better than muggles is because he’s able to kill them with impunity using magic, something he’s only able to do so easily because muggles don’t understand what magic is. Voldemort is basically like a fucking disease, he’s an invisible, lurking entity preying on mankind from the shadows like a cowardly piece of shit. You know what else did that? Smallpox and we stomped that to death the second we understood it. That’s the difference between muggles and wizards, when muggles don’t understand something, they figure it out.
And here’s the kicker, the only reason muggles don’t understand magic at all is because the wizarding world deliberately withholds information about it. However, even if the wizarding world kept doing that, it’d only be a matter of time until a muggle figured out what magic was and how to stop or harness it because that’s what humanity does, it pushes past what we think is impossible to see what’s on the other side. We didn’t understand the sun as a species originally and now we use it to power satellites and smartphones.
The wizarding world isn’t a realm of infinite possibilities, it’s a universe of strict limitations where boundaries are never questioned. The muggle world is where the real magic happens. That’s why during the course of the Harry Potter books, which are set between 1991 and 1998, the muggle world (our world) discovered dark matter, cloned a sheep and invented fucking MP3s while the wizarding world were literally paying some dipshit to figure out what the purpose of a rubber duck was.
Wow, I really shouldn’t think about this stuff when it’s like 3AM, it gets kind of dark.
#the wizarding world prides itself on standing still#because they think they’re already at the pinnacle#but they’re not and one of these days they’ll find that out the hard way
“Oh, he just turns invisible? Right, we’ll get a SWAT team with heat vision goggles on it. You can expect your Dark Lord dead in about an hour.”
06 Sun Mar 2016
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sarriane: refinery29: Need a cheat sheet for wizard finance? We got you Based on the calculations of an inspired fan, …
04 Fri Mar 2016
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hexa-chrome: guess what. it’s my 200th post on this blog (i highly suggest you to click and read the captions)
25 Thu Feb 2016
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the-future-now: College student creates working Weasley clock Remember that clock the Weasleys had in Harry Potter that kept track of …
22 Mon Feb 2016
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Have you ever thought about how Harry wasted a huge opportunity when he dropped the Resurrection Stone in the Forbidden Forest?
Okay just imagine if he had kept it.
He dies, comes back, defeats Voldemort…
Only now there are over one-hundred people who have died in just The Battle of Hogwarts alone. Not to mention all of those names that were read on the radio throughout the year. (And everyone else who died before then.)
So the Golden Trio gets this idea…
They quickly spread the word and pretty soon, Harry sets up a room in Hogwarts with nothing in it but a desk and a chair. He sits in the chair behind the desk and calls people into the room one at a time.
Harry insists that the Weasleys be the first to enter. And so George walks in, puffy-eyed but smiling, and asks Harry what the big secret is.
Harry then plops an ordinary pebble into George’s hand.
George is very confused until he hears his name being whispered from behind him. George turns and of course there’s Fred. And the two twins are able to properly say goodbye to one another.
Harry then allows the entire Weasley family to come in and they all huddle around Fred’s spirit and are able to say goodbye. And of course Mrs. Weasley drags Harry out from behind the desk and he joins the family hug.
Are you crying yet?
Because I am.
But let’s keep going.
Mrs. Weasley’s hand brushes against the stone and Fabian and Gideon appear to say goodbye to their sister.
After the Weasleys finally leave, Harry brings Dennis in so that he can say goodbye to Colin.
Harry then individually brings in the family member(s) of the unnamed one-hundred students who died during the Battle of Hogwarts.
Harry then brings in Luna so that she can say goodbye to her mother.
He brings in pretty much all of Hogwarts so that they can say goodbye to Cedric.
He brings in Aberforth so that he can say goodbye to Albus and Ariana.
He brings in those who want to say goodbye to Snape.
He brings in Kreacher so that he can say goodbye to Regulus.
He brings in the rest of the house-elves so that they can say goodbye to Dobby.
And when Harry is done letting everyone else say goodbye to their loved ones, he closes his hand around the stone.
The first one to appear is a beautiful white owl who flies over to Harry and allows herself to be affectionately petted.
Then of course the others appear, just as they did in the Forbidden Forest on that fateful night. Harry doesn’t talk to them for too long, he’s grown up a lot since the Mirror of Erised, but he is able to make peace with his loved ones’ sacrifices.
And even then, he still keeps the stone.
He doesn’t use it again. Not personally, anyway. In fact, he stores it in a dusty box on the mantel in his house. He doesn’t use it. But he doesn’t forget it, either. Because he needs it for one last task.
And when the boy with the turquoise hair is old enough to understand, Harry gently sits him down and places a stone in his hand.
And Teddy Lupin meets Remus and Nymphadora.
17 Wed Feb 2016
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inthemightyglamazon: albinwonderland: if I’m crying about Hagrid at 5am I’m taking all of you with me Rubeus Hagrid appreciation life. …
11 Thu Feb 2016
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ginnydear: acciowintershield: ❅ OH MY GOD ITS MY TEXT POST IN GIF FORM I LOVE IT